When I first decided I was going to start a blog, I had a vague idea of being uplifting to others with chronic illnesses and chronic pain. I wanted to do that through my love of makeup and with the fact that I live this life right along with you. To me, a small victory is getting up when I’m ready, doing my hair and makeup, and maybe getting out of my pajamas.
I feel like that is a major struggle for many people with chronic illness and pain. But if I don’t give the people around me a glimpse of the person I was before this took complete hold of my life, I’m afraid I will lose myself.
The name Chronically Contoured is a play on words between chronic illness and pain and makeup and beauty products in general. And then as I started writing more I realized that, to me, it was so much more. When you contour your face you’re creating an optical illusion that some of your features are different. You can narrow your nose, accentuate your cheek bones, make your lips appear fuller because these are things you like.
What I like is for those around me to see that I’m still here so I have started contouring my life a little bit, as well. I sugarcoat the exhaustion, the chronic pain, and just general feeling of being unwell. Not just for me but so my husband and kids can see that I haven’t given up. I’m still the same wife and mom, sometimes trapped in a body that can’t function, but I’m still here and I’m still fighting.
Chronically is pretty self explanatory. I will always have these diseases. My body will continue to fight itself. But if I can push myself a little bit to still feel like a human being, maybe I can connect with someone else who feels like “why bother?” Because that was me for longer than I care to admit. But also, I will chronically fight to pull myself and those suffering with me out of this hole our bodies have left us with so we can feel human. You are still the glorious being you always were, it’s just a bit harder to find that in yourself now.
I want people to read my blog and find encouragement, solidarity, and hope. To reflect on their lives and feel that extra boost to find themselves among the rubble their mind and body have left them with.
We are all going to have bad days. It’s inevitable. But maybe, just maybe, on the days when you feel like you can venture out of bed, you can find the strength to do something for yourself. Even if it’s just taking a shower and putting on clean pjs.
I am here rooting for you, fighting this battle alongside you, and hopefully giving you encouragement and sometimes helping you find something to take your mind off the pain and exhaustion even for just a few minutes a day.
And hopefully as I contour my face and my life, I can gain encouragement from you as well. Because who are we if we feel alone during the biggest fights of our life? We are strong but its so much easier to be stronger when someone is helping us fight.